Astagfirullah al azim, Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, Allahuakbar
Never back then, that I wish I may reach Oxford someday..
Dear Friends and Followers.
This is the very post where I share my ambition and inspiration toward Oxford.
I was grown up as a simple and lame girl back in my primary school. I never know what I'm good at. Teachers never reward me with any word of praise, thus I assume that I am just an ordinary girl school without any specialty that other people may be looked for. I never score in my exam, I am not the top 10 student in my school. I am not a reliable person to be chosen as a group leader at any kind of competitions or sports event. I do think even, some my school teachers will not remember me as an ex-student in SK Taman Nirwana. It was a gloomy year. A year that thought me so much. A year where I've learned that "I am not just an ordinary as other people always look in me"
To tell you the truth, among all the memories of my school era..I never come to like the year of my primary school.
As things changed, so do I.
The year after puberty and rising up of maturity was the year where I began to understand myself. Though it is not I understand myself completely, however, I began to set a life goal and target that I want to achieve.
The year of growing up in secondary school with challenges and competition to be at top was really an amazing journey. I never had imagined that I have the ability to be good in mathematics. I never had thought that I am also good at english and science. As to conclude, I am also as brilliant as other top 10 students back then in my primary school. It was the will, the life goals and the targets that making me working so hard to improve myself to be as good as others.
My hardships payed off. So, it's true, what you give you get back. I scored with flying colours in my PMR and SPM. It was not that I am the one among the straight A's girls. I obtained few B's in my result but rather, the A's is enough to bring me to the next level of a student life.
The story begin as when I'm entering my 4 years as an undergarduate in IIUM. International Islamic University Malaysia, The Garden of Knowledge and Virtue. This is the bless land. A land which I get a chance to know myself better. A land where I've started to plant a dream of becoming a better servant, a better muslim, a better daughter, a better friend, a better wife to be and Insyallah a better mom.
Where can I imagined, that life had bring me this far. I've started as a girl who's afraid of getting married. I never fall in love, I never had someone which I admire so much, I never had a man which I always look for, I dont even know what is the type of man whom I want to marry. I was a loser when others brought this issues up. I dont know exactly the purpose of getting married back then.
Like I said beforehand, life had bring me this far..it was time after time that the love of Allah slipped through my lifeline. I began to understand what was there that marriage serve for. Despite all the negative perceptions, now I've started my journey of improving myself as a whole for the sake Allah, and to please Allah and His prophet Muhammad SAW. It was like a new born baby, having to pave a new journey in this life.
However, it is not the issue of love and marriage that I aim to share..
As we grow old, maturity grew older as well. When we living a life as an undergraduate student, there are few times where we happened to think of where our future will bring us. What do we want in this life? How can we contribute to Ummah? Is that it? dont we want to always upgrading ourselves to the next level. Do I have to move out from my comfort zone? Do I have to learn to be more independent and survivor. I began to question myself with all the questions.
Deep down my true heart, I've always dream to continue my studying in overseas. When my cousin had her chance to continue her undergraduate in Ireland, it can be denied that 30% of jelousy was there lied within me. She's got what she dreamed after all. I asked Allah, the night where my cousin departed to Ireland.
"O Allah, do I have the chance to be just like my cousin, will I be able to continue my study in overseas. O Allah do reward me an ease of my every journey. O Allah, today, I raised up my hand telling You my very wish..allow me to reach Oxford for my Postgraduate study"
That night, it was the first time where I had make my pray, telling Allah about my dream to reach Oxford. Since then, I am very ambitious to continue postgraduate in Oxford. It grew stronger within me. It is like a deep root of a larger tree. No matter how strong the cutter force, it never has the chance to cut the root though it had cutted the the tree, but the root is still there.
Some of my friend asking me,
Here lie the ambition and inspiration. I always want to reach the best and be the best. Not for anyone else not even for my parent. Despite, this is something that I am specially working hard for the sake of Allah. I want to challenge myself, thus I've decided to do it by having a big dream. I choose Oxford as to dream big and to prepare myself at the beginning point of all these.
The bigger the dream the harder the journey and the more will I struggle to be there. I've come with mission. Oxford is where many scholers and nobel laureates were born. To go there is to challenge oneself. It has name and brand. It is prestigous. It provides you with latest scientific research, best education, top world class lecturer and complete facilities. To improve oneself to the next level in education, I believe Oxford is the best choice to make.
At this moment, I may not be there yet..
I'm in my way to reach Oxford.
Do pray for my success, so that one day I will be able to continue my postgraduate in Oxford.
Don't be afraid to dream big,
Don't be afraid to challenge yourself,
Don't always be in our comfort zone, step out! that's the way we learn that we are beyond what we've imagined.
We have Allah and we have Rasulullah SAW and that's the reason that make us stronger than anyone else.
Oxford: My Ambition and Inspiration
Nurul Damia Mohamad Sofian